I don't know what's gotten into my mind lately but the music i've been listening (inside my coaster in between travel to and from work) from my iPod was the same song over and over. Before the track ends, I keep on playing it back again and I never get tired of listening to it. There is something in this song that made me walk down the memory lane. It just brings back a few not so good memories from my past but that one moment where this song was in filling up the air to rhythm a dance was particularly memorable to me. I don't know why. Is it because it was my first dance? Or maybe just because its title says it all...
I know this is ridiculous. I recently found someone from my past through friendster. Viewing at his profile's media box, there was 'Tattooed on My Mind' in his playlist which coincidentally is in my playlist also. Funny how this song remains his favorite and mine too despite what we've been through. Again, I think the title just says it all.
Sunday, November 9, 2008
Saturday, November 8, 2008
Time to say goodbye
When something begins, something ends. Every beginning has an ending. Every start has its stop. Is it time for me to bid farewell to my friend? How I met him at the most unexpected place in the most unexpected time, is how I'm gonna be saying my sad goodbye.
Sometime last week, I had to see this friend to give him some stuff he forgot to bring from office. And so we met and had dinner. After dinner, he had to stay near the place where we ate for him to hail a taxi. On the other hand, I had to go in separate direction from him as my flat is only a walking-distance. After walking a couple of steps, I heard him shouted my name. I turned my head back and saw him waving his hands. Is that waving goodbye for real? Could that be his final goodbye? I didn't want to but I waved back at him and half smiled lest he'll wonder about sadness in my face. But what is obvious cannot be hidden.
It was not so long ago when we first said our surprising hello to each other...New year to be exact...But the trouble with hello is saying goodbye...But what really heals my heart is saying goodbye means another hello. After all, this world is just a small palce. It could be that we may not see each other forever. But, this I can say, he will always be a part of my life, a part of who I am and he will always be in my heart as my friend. Some people are never meant to be forgotten.
For whatever may everything could end up to, I'm surely gonna be missing him. He could tell why. I could tell why. Some people could tell why. He once told me that someday I will miss his being 'makulit' and yes, I couldn't agree more. =)
Sometime last week, I had to see this friend to give him some stuff he forgot to bring from office. And so we met and had dinner. After dinner, he had to stay near the place where we ate for him to hail a taxi. On the other hand, I had to go in separate direction from him as my flat is only a walking-distance. After walking a couple of steps, I heard him shouted my name. I turned my head back and saw him waving his hands. Is that waving goodbye for real? Could that be his final goodbye? I didn't want to but I waved back at him and half smiled lest he'll wonder about sadness in my face. But what is obvious cannot be hidden.
It was not so long ago when we first said our surprising hello to each other...New year to be exact...But the trouble with hello is saying goodbye...But what really heals my heart is saying goodbye means another hello. After all, this world is just a small palce. It could be that we may not see each other forever. But, this I can say, he will always be a part of my life, a part of who I am and he will always be in my heart as my friend. Some people are never meant to be forgotten.
For whatever may everything could end up to, I'm surely gonna be missing him. He could tell why. I could tell why. Some people could tell why. He once told me that someday I will miss his being 'makulit' and yes, I couldn't agree more. =)
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Tinkering
I have this hour to blog before I go home (yehey! tomorrow's weekend) since I've already finished sending e-mails to McNally. I'm done for the day except one pending question I have to Ali which as of this minute haven't received response yet. Since their clock is Eastern Time in the US, he's probably haven't woke up or just about to prepare to drive to office. Whatever. Honestly, I don't wanna receive e-mails from any one of them now that will force me to work and reply at the last minute. I hate it. But, this is just a compelling task and what can I do? Checking my inbox, yahoo, nothing's coming. Please, please, don't come, hahah! Time's ticking away. I can't wait to go down to get myself food from vendo to satisfy this scranching stomach. Or is it? I just wanna get out from here as I don't understand these butterflies in my stomach.
Two of my friends are flying home later. Probably, as of this minute, they're busy taking cab to the airport. Or, they could be on their way. Haaayyy! Nothing feels better than to know that you are finally going home and seeing people you missed. These two must be oozing with that homecoming glow and excitement. It always has been my wishful thinking to fly with them but naaah! Impossible! I just had my fleeting vacation.
To the two of you, make sure you will have a grand vacation. Enjoy it and enjoy life! Have a safe and sound trip. Spare you from the nightmare I've had 30 thousand + feet above ground. You know what I'm talking to. Hahaha! I'm missing you both!!! And see you when you both come back!!!
I guess it's time to go. Bye everyone!
Two of my friends are flying home later. Probably, as of this minute, they're busy taking cab to the airport. Or, they could be on their way. Haaayyy! Nothing feels better than to know that you are finally going home and seeing people you missed. These two must be oozing with that homecoming glow and excitement. It always has been my wishful thinking to fly with them but naaah! Impossible! I just had my fleeting vacation.
To the two of you, make sure you will have a grand vacation. Enjoy it and enjoy life! Have a safe and sound trip. Spare you from the nightmare I've had 30 thousand + feet above ground. You know what I'm talking to. Hahaha! I'm missing you both!!! And see you when you both come back!!!
I guess it's time to go. Bye everyone!
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Landslide Victory for Barack Obama
For the first time in the history of the USA, the country elected its first black president in the person of Barack Obama who won a landslide vistory over John McCain.
I am not an expert to say that Obama should win and now he's won, it's the best outcome by far. They say that Obama is the best leader to a great nation that is now in the battle of many crusades, most importantly the economic recession. They say that Obama will become the hero and will save the country by his 'Change' platform.
Well, my little sentiment is that I am happy that Obama won over McCain. I have a blind faith that he's gonna make a difference and won't let American people down.
But, whoever may seat in this great and challenging position, what's most important is that he's able to lead in great responsibilty for the welfare of the people and the nation as one.
God bless America!
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Into the blue
That is stupidity as they may say…for not having learned my lesson...still didn’t get it despite looking at what could be a bitter reality from what I used to choose to believe things are. This blood-pumping organ is temporarily sheltered and is taking advantage of whatever respite it can get from any form of unwanted torment. This allowed me rest and what seemed to be pretense happiness…mentally and emotionally…saving enough of (the rest) me come the inevitable storm. This allowed me to live a day after another as if I am in world far from the real.
But, this pause is in time playing as life continues to buffer. Unfortunately, this life offers no stops (unless we’re six feet under), no rewinds (if there is, I would’ve gone back), no fast forwards (if there is, I would’ve opted to play at every happy part). But this cannot be this way for a long time no matter how I wanted to keep it that way. Too bad that this life is just equated with inevitable things and circumstances no matter how amount of care is justified.
Yes, I have to. I have to keep myself strong from getting to that point where refusal wouldn’t do much of help but rather acceptance. And acceptance is the hardest part of all. It’s not easy being in a waiting mode, as I’ve always been, where I need to draw the line between continuing believing and not, hoping and not, then tell myself (with some poking in the head required) ‘this is it’, ‘it’s enough’, ‘wake up!’
I have read a famous book a long time ago but the message about dreaming and reaching for that dream has always imbibed in my memory. Simply stated, it says that if you really want something or someone in your life, you must go for it and in that direction because the universe will conspire with you to get it. Indeed, the universe had worked conspiracy with me many times, even if I look back before I’ve read that book. I have always experienced being in this scenario and associated it with the writer’s wisdom even if I need not to because I have always believed in God’s workings instead of the universe’s. But this has nothing to do with my faith. Believing in such wisdom is not bad at all.
However, this ‘universe-conspiracy’ theory doesn’t work to me this time. It won’t always be in your side even if you are going and pushing hard in what could be the right direction. We don’t always get what we want because that something or someone we want is not meant to be ours.
This is all I can say (in general). There are earthly things in this life, no matter how much you desire for it won’t be yours. There’s that someone, no matter how much you prayed for him/her, wouldn’t be yours, and so, that f***ing four-letter word that stupidly grows without watering remains unspoken, untold even unrequited to some extent.
(Yeah, I know this is soooo corny!)
But, this pause is in time playing as life continues to buffer. Unfortunately, this life offers no stops (unless we’re six feet under), no rewinds (if there is, I would’ve gone back), no fast forwards (if there is, I would’ve opted to play at every happy part). But this cannot be this way for a long time no matter how I wanted to keep it that way. Too bad that this life is just equated with inevitable things and circumstances no matter how amount of care is justified.
Yes, I have to. I have to keep myself strong from getting to that point where refusal wouldn’t do much of help but rather acceptance. And acceptance is the hardest part of all. It’s not easy being in a waiting mode, as I’ve always been, where I need to draw the line between continuing believing and not, hoping and not, then tell myself (with some poking in the head required) ‘this is it’, ‘it’s enough’, ‘wake up!’
I have read a famous book a long time ago but the message about dreaming and reaching for that dream has always imbibed in my memory. Simply stated, it says that if you really want something or someone in your life, you must go for it and in that direction because the universe will conspire with you to get it. Indeed, the universe had worked conspiracy with me many times, even if I look back before I’ve read that book. I have always experienced being in this scenario and associated it with the writer’s wisdom even if I need not to because I have always believed in God’s workings instead of the universe’s. But this has nothing to do with my faith. Believing in such wisdom is not bad at all.
However, this ‘universe-conspiracy’ theory doesn’t work to me this time. It won’t always be in your side even if you are going and pushing hard in what could be the right direction. We don’t always get what we want because that something or someone we want is not meant to be ours.
This is all I can say (in general). There are earthly things in this life, no matter how much you desire for it won’t be yours. There’s that someone, no matter how much you prayed for him/her, wouldn’t be yours, and so, that f***ing four-letter word that stupidly grows without watering remains unspoken, untold even unrequited to some extent.
(Yeah, I know this is soooo corny!)
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